A great friend of mine had a different way of putting this concept. She always said, “If you don’t ask the answer is NO.” Actually, by telling ourselves no, we are following much the same course as closing a door because fear tells us to open it.
Sometimes you may have discovered, if you had only opened that door, there was a wonderful friendship, or other amazing discovery waiting there, that you would have enjoyed. Of course we all need to be cautious in a society that seems to generate a huge amount of hacking and scams. But to back off on one thing after another out of fear can’t always be the best answer.
Think of people you know who seldom back off.
They may confide later that they were scared silly when they launched that new project, or approached the boss for a raise, but they felt the job needed to be done and moved ahead.
The next time one of those doors looms and you have to weigh caution against action, make a list and try to get at the heart of what you are really afraid of. You may have struck out in a similar area before. Or maybe too many of your friends are telling you it’s a bad idea. Or you may have had a string of bad results lately and you just do not want to risk having another one.
But if after compiling the list you are still drawn to opening that door, then think of some good reasons why you should. Maybe you have done a lot of research that says this is positive, or you have a deep sense that it is a good choice. Or it resembles others that have worked for you.
So if you really feel like this could work, do a little more homework to back up your hunch. Let it roll around your mind. Make some more notes. Keep working on the idea and thinking it through. When you have given yourself enough good reasons, then maybe you owe it to yourself to tell fear NO and push that door open.
Life will keep coming up with doors to push open or leave closed, but the more you try the better chance you will have of finding really good people, opportunities and situations that you absolutely would not have wanted to miss.
Think about it again and tell yourself YES.
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